10 Children, 3 Months in Jail, 1 Life-Changing Program—The Anthony P. Story

For Anthony, the blueprint of manhood was originally drawn behind bars. Growing up without a father, the only male influence in his life was his grandfather—a man who spent decades in prison. Their relationship was built on weekly phone calls through a recorded line, discussing life decisions from within a cell. With no other roadmap, Anthony’s early life followed a predictable, dangerous path: gang affiliation, drug activity, and a revolving door of jail cells.

“I never had a father to show me the way, just a grandfather behind a phone line,” Anthony says. “I knew if I didn’t change, my ten kids were going to grow up with a memory instead of a dad. They were the only reason I kept fighting.”

The cycle reached a breaking point when Anthony’s past finally caught up with him, landing him in prison. In a bitter twist of irony, Anthony was released on probation the exact same day his grandfather was finally freed. But the reunion was short-lived. One year later, his grandfather passed away, plunging Anthony into a deep depression that manifested as rage. “After losing my grandfather, I had no motivation,” Anthony recalls. “I didn’t want to interact with my children. I was filled with anger, which caused me to make a big mistake.”

That mistake sent him back to jail for three months—a final wake-up call. Upon his release, Anthony heard about Fathers & Families Support Center (FFSC) from an uncle and an alumnus. Realizing he needed to change the “flow” of his life for his ten children, he enrolled in the six-week Family Formation program in North County.

The Turning Point
The transformation was immediate. For the first time, Anthony was in a room full of men who had walked his path. “Being around grown men with life experience that can relate with my own experiences made me feel comfortable and willing to listen,” he says. Through the program and the support of FFSC therapist Dr. Eddie McCaskill, Anthony dismantled the “combative” communication style that had defined his past.
This change was felt instantly at home. Anthony learned that providing for his children meant more than just financial support; it meant being emotionally present. He shifted from a “quick to discipline” mindset to one of active listening.

A Resounding Impact
His children noticed the shift immediately, finding a father who was finally present in the ways that mattered most. “It used to feel like my dad was there but not really ‘there.’ Now, he listens to us,” his daughter shares. “We don’t just see him on weekends; we actually talk. He’s the person I go to when I’m proud of something.”

“I remember when things were loud and angry,” his son echoes. “Now, our weekends are about playing darts and going to the park. Seeing my dad go to work every morning dressed up makes me want to work just as hard as he does.” The peace even extended to his co-parenting relationships. The mother of his children reflects: “We used to only speak through arguments. Because of FFSC, Anthony learned how to communicate without the anger. It’s allowed us to be a family again, even if we aren’t under the same roof.”

A New Legacy
Today, Anthony is no longer looking for a roadmap; he is building one. After securing a role as a Leasing Agent through an FFSC Job Fair, he has continued to climb, now serving as an Assistant Manager at Family Dollar. He recently achieved the milestone of purchasing a new home, where one of his children resides with him full-time.

Even with his oldest daughter living as far away as Japan, he makes weekly communication a priority. “If you went through this program and didn’t learn anything,” Anthony says firmly, “you are lying to yourself and about who you truly are.”

The FFSC Impact

• Ending Intergenerational Incarceration: Anthony broke a three-generation cycle of “fatherhood via phone call,” ensuring his children have a present, physical father figure.
• Emotional Intelligence & Therapy: By working with FFSC therapists, Anthony transitioned from “combative” communication to healthy dialogue with both his children and their mothers.
• Economic Empowerment: Through the FFSC Job Fair and financial literacy training, Anthony moved from “survival-based” income to a professional career and homeownership.
• Parenting with Voice: Anthony’s shift from strict, reactive discipline to listening-based parenting has empowered his children to find their own voices and thrive.